Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Camper Full Of Men?

Sportsmen, Coachmen, Dutchmen

I have often wondered  at the peculiar names of these campers, or as they are now called, RV's, emblazoning the front top of the vehicle for all to scratch their heads at.  Is the Dutchmen model supposed to be full of guys from the Netherlands?  Is Holland the birthplace of such a vehicle?  How many coaches of various sports can fit inside a Coachmen?  Or is this an homage to the days when coach drivers would all live together in the chuck wagon?

My point is, these names are plural for objects that are singular.  To illustrate my point, lets look at automobile model names.  "Jim drives a Ford Mustangs." doesn't sound right, does it?  How about "Hello, I'd like to buy a Cadillacs."  "What kind of mileage will I get in this Priuses?"  (Prii?) Yikes!

The notion that this could go on at a company that manufactures these vehicles for so long without the mistake being pointed out and corrected is baffling.  I imagine the aging president of the company asserting at the board meeting, "Damn it!  I founded this company, and you will NOT change the name of this camper!  How dare you upstarts correct my grammar?"

What is more baffling is what I found out when I researched this phenomenon on the Internets.  I figured that Dutchmen, Sportsmen, and Coachmen were all different models manufactured by the same RV company.  It would stand to reason, but it is not so.  Coachmen Recreational Vehicles was founded in Middlebury, Indiana in 1964, and they produced camping trailers called Coachmen.  It would appear that in 1972 KZ Recreational Vehicles was founded, also in Middlebury, Indiana.  Possibly this was split off from the Coachmen company.  They produced campers named Sportsmen.  Dutchmen Manufacturing Inc. was founded in 1988.  Their site does not mention a city.   They produce sport vehicles called Dutchmen, Aspen Trail, Coleman, Kodiak and others.  So this grammar anomaly exists at two, possibly three different companies!  Weird!

Lots of people in Pediddleville say they're going to "Walmart's", which is wrong, but understandable since it harkens back to the days when there used to be a store or two in every town in this country that was named after the family that ran it.  Elkin's.  Thatcher's.  Harry's.  Mom and Pop's.  But the Camper Full of Men remains a mystery...


Thursday, June 7, 2012

Driving Alone At Night With The Music Privilege

The Law of Pediddleville dictates that I may not have full freedom to enjoy my choice of music in the car that I drive.  This has been a long-standing curse that I have endured and accepted with a sense of humor.  No matter what car I drive on a regular basis to work or anytime I go somewhere on my own, I usually drive the older, more beat-up of our two vehicles, and there is always some issue with the sound system in that vehicle.  The cassette or CD player stops working.  You only get one channel.  The knobs don't do what they're supposed to do.  You can only get the strongest of commercial radio stations.  I have soldiered through all of these unpleasantries in several different cars.  Pediddleville Law, being similar to Murphy's Law, makes it not worth fixing or replacing the sound system because the car won't be around long enough to warrant the expense.  So I endure with what I can get.  Since there is no chance of getting pulled over for a broken sound system, I endure longer than I usually do with a burnt out headlight.  Procrastination rules the Nation of Pediddleville, which gets its name from the one-headlighted automobile.

One night I was driving our better vehicle, a mini-van that has a CD player that actually works.  Though I didn't think to bring along any CD's, I found a burned CD-R copy of "With The Beatles" and "A Hard Day's Night" that I had made for my sons to listen to.  This is music so ingrained in my soul that I could listen to it in my head without any kind of sound system.  I do, after all, have a very good auditory memory.  So I was driving, listening to clear sounding music that I had chosen--Wow!  I had the The Music Privilege!  After I got close to home I realized that all this time I could have been listening to my friend DeadBob's radio show.  I was so into the idea that I had The Music Privilege that I missed out on something that I probably would have enjoyed more.

Well, the other day the car I've been driving crapped out.  This car had a dead CD player--radio only.  Now we'll be registering an old pick-up truck that I'll be driving.  You guessed it-no working sound system at all.  Thank God for the iPad I recently bought...the iPad my son dropped the other day and cracked the glass, and I didn't buy the insurance.

There's no place like Pediddleville...

Monday, June 4, 2012

Tank Update #2: Disappearance And Death...Hercules Joins The School...King Is Queen?

As Spring nears Summer, I remember one of the reasons for setting up the tank.  The previous summer had been difficult, for many reasons, but Salmon River was the one thing that redeemed it.  It's a wonderful, beautiful place to go, a minute from home, and free.  I had always wanted to have an aquarium with some type of local fish, and the idea was to have something in the house to remind me of that wonderful place through the winter, when I could not go there for recreation.  I imagined sitting there in the easy chair, watching the fish and remembering back to the warm days of fishing, swimming, and snorkeling with my family.  It wasn't so bad a winter as I expected, not like last year, but it was still nice to have the tank.

Down to ten Dace, the fish in the tank appear to be doing well now.  There have been a few interesting occurrences.  As reported earlier, Giorgio, the very camouflaged bottom feeder has died, though his body has never been found.  Could the Dace have eaten him?  Soon after Giorgio's demise, I noticed that I could only find ten Dace when there had been eleven.

The smallest of the Dace had been named Hercules by my sons.  He generally kept to himself, probably due to his size, while the rest actively schooled around, scarfing up the goldfish flakes when they were dropped in, but though he was solitary, I could always find him.  He would spend a lot of time alone near the bottom, not getting as much food as the others, but he has definitely grown since October.

One of the smaller fish had developed a problem--an apparent ruptured swim bladder.  He had a cavity where the rest of the Dace have a prominent bulge.  He would try to swim up, but couldn't stay off the bottom for long.  This fish would be a goner in the river.  He had a bent look near his head, and I wondered if he had gotten crushed when I was cleaning the tank.  He would try to rise, but quickly lose it and sink again, resting on rocks or on the gravel bottom.  After a while he seemed to be doing better.  He was still disabled, but could move, and was able to get some food.  Now he has made nearly a full recovery.  His spine is crooked, which is very evidently shown by the black stripe down his side.  The line is kinked just past the pectoral fins.  He'd still have no chance in the river, but in my tank, he's able to keep up with the school and doesn't seem to be struggling at all.

This still doesn't address the missing eleventh fish.  I thought maybe he'd leaped out of the tank and was eaten by my cat, but it was just a theory.  Hercules had been spending a lot of time in the far right corner of the tank swimming around a big rock with another flat rock laying on it, creating a hiding spot.  One day recently I spotted a strange looking white object at the bottom near this little cave.  It was curved and was moving.  It was the missing Dace.  He was paralyzed, laying upside down, unable to straighten out.  A mercy flush later and the tank had ten confirmed residents.  Almost immediately Hercules started swimming with the school again.  Had he been caring for this disabled fish, his work now done?

Another thing that I have seen, three times now, was a real surprise the first time I saw it.  One night I went into the room to look at the fish, and at first couldn't tell what was different-looking about King Dace.  The black stripe that runs the length of the body was much thinner, and the yellow stripe that lines the top of the black one was much thicker than normal, giving the fish an unusual look.  The fish actually seemed smaller than normal due to this colorization.  What was going on?  Some as-yet-unseen behavior was about to unfold.  King Dace started swishing around in a small gravel area near the front of the tank.  Soon, one of the larger other Dace started doing the same in the same area.  They were spawning.  Now the sexist misunderstanding came to light.   "King Dace" first, then the smaller male doing his business.  Just because she's the biggest fish doesn't mean she's the King.  I suppose the color variation was a hormonal thing, meant to attract the male.  The two of them did this several times, then when they were done, left the scene, swam around the tank, then returned promptly and began eating the eggs!

I've been feeding them goldfish flakes, and they seem to be doing well on them.  Certainly all of them have grown except for Queen Dace, who according to what I could find on the internet,  is full-grown at about three inches.  When I set up the tank there were two fish almost exactly the same size and were just over half as long as Queen Dace.  Now they are almost as big as Queen Dace, and it is sometimes hard to tell them apart.  These two fish I called "The Henchman" because they seemed to be the flanks to the King in my little aquarium society.  The way to tell them apart from Queen Dace is that they are more meaty, especially in the tail than she is, and I wonder if that is due to the goldfish flake diet that she didn't grow up on.  I wonder if The Henchmen will end up being much larger than her?